Friday, August 19, 2011

Down the Rabbit Hole

The world is upside down.  

Have I ever talked about how I stayed away from my family for over a year and a half because I have a PTSD response to them?  The expression "you make me sick" must at one time have been literal.

This is because my family is nuts. 

Really, there is some weird kind of  mental illness, undiagnosed, that runs straight through my genes. 

Some symptoms:  

1) Constant inane conversation in which insignificant details are repeated over and over and over:

My mom: "Blah, blah, blabbity, blah, blah."
Me:  "Mum, you told me that already."
My mom:  "No I didn't."
Me:  "Yeah, you did
My mom:  "Blah, blah, blabbity blah blah......"  (completely ignoring me)
Me:  (Form pretend gun, place to head, pull trigger)

Listening to my mom's stories is soul death.

2) A complete lack of awareness of others' personal space or boundaries.  

Me:  "Mom, quit grabbing my ass and kissing me smack on the lips."
My mom:  "You know you like it."

3)  Pathological contempt and judgment of others
My mom:  "That doctor doesn't know what he's talking about.  Why just the other day I heard Sharon Osborne on The Talk say blahbity, blah, blah...."

4)  Debilitating self centeredness 
My mom:  Blabbity, me, blah, blah I, blabbity, blabbity, me, me, me.  Also refer to #1

My mom broke her leg, dad had hip surgery and now my grandmother is in the hospital with a compression fracture.  Did I mention no one in the family drives?  Oh, wait a minute.  I drive. Mmm, hmm. 

Being around my family is akin to being invited to jump right in and join the crazy.  Boundaries people.  You can have your crazy, just don't go crossing over into mine.